What The F...ork

Published: Dec 10, 2019

The season ends with a few surprises and the resulting playoffs have a stunning entry.

The key game for the playoff races was the Amish Electricians vs Richard's Lionhearts.  Both teams were in contention, but the Lionhearts would secure a spot with a win.  A loss and the door would be open for the MeggaMen and the TMC.  The Amish had a tenuous 7 point lead going into Monday night and it wasn't enough.  Antonie Bethea (DB-NYG) scored 11 and Doug Pederso n(HC-PHI) picked up the overtime win to secure a 23-14 win for the Lionhearts.  That sends Richard to the playoffs for the first time.

With the Lionhearts win, the MeggaMen were eliminated but they did everything they could in hopes that the other game would turn out differently.  They picked up a dominate 61-17 point victory over the British Bulldogs, to finish 8-6.

Warren also found himself eliminated regardless of the result of his game, but wouldn't have qualified anyway, as Trump Molests Collies lost to the Gallic Warriors 57-29.  The win ensured that the Gallic Warriors would not be in the Toilet Bowl.

In the battle for the number one seed, the Norsemen only needed a win.  It was a win that should have been fairly easy for the Norsemen, but they were unable to get it.  Sean Taylor's Ashes rallied behind Drew Brees (QB-NO) and his 43 points to beat the Norsemen 44-16.  The win left open the possibility that the STA could avoid the Toilet Bowl.

Another division winner, the Crusaders also struggled against a Toilet Bowl contender.  But they were able to hold off the Fighting Squirrels to net a single point win, 16-15.  The loss sends the Squirrels to the Toilet Bowl for the second straight season.

Finally the Testudos Revenge secured the #1 seed with a 37-5 victory over the Sacks on the Beach.  This extends the Testudos winning streak to 9 games.

After the dust settles we end up with the following seedings:

#1 Testudos Revenge

#2 Crusaders

#3 Norsemen

#4 Richard's Lionheartts

The Lionhearts win the wild card at 8-6 with tiebreaker because of their week 2 head-to-head over the MeggaMen.  This is really an astounding result.  Richard had to win five of his last six games to get here, including three in a row.  The lowest scoring team on the season makes the playoffs and the highest scoring team (MeggaMen) misses them.  Which just seems very broken, but that is what a +21.4 luck rating will get you.

Playoffs

#1 Testudos Revenge (11-3) vs #4 Richard's Lionhearts (8-6)

 

  • Testudos have won 9 straight games
  • Lionhearts have won 5 out of last 6
  • Testudos won week 6 matchup, 46-14
  • Testudos lead the all-time series 6-4
  • Both teams are in the playoffs for only the second time
  • The Lionhearts (then Mansfield Onanists) lost in the first round in 2012
  • Derek won the Championship in 2016
  • Testudos are 9.5 point favorites and have a 68% chance of victory

 

#2 Crusaders (10-4) vs #3 Norsemen (10-4)

  • Crusaders have won 8 of their last 9 games
  • Norsemen are coming off a loss but had won the previous 3
  • Crusaders won the week 10 matchup, 56-26
  • All-Time the Crusaders lead the series 25-17-1
  • Crusaders have won 10 of the last 12 meetings
  • They have met in the playoffs three times, the Crusaders won in 1998 and 2008, with the Norsemen winning the Championship in 2000.
  • Crusaders are #1 in all-time wins with 231, and #2 in record .568.
  • Norsemen are #2 in all-time wins with 227 and #4 in record .553.
  • Norsemen are favored by 12 and have a 69% chance of winning


Toilet Bowl

British Bulldogs (2-12) vs Fighting Squirrels (5-9)

  • Bulldogs have lost the last five games
  • The Squirrels beat the Bulldogs two weeks ago, 24-19
  • Bulldogs have been to the most Toilet Bowls, this is their 8th
  • Squirrels have been to the second most Toilet Bowls, this is their 7th
  • They have met three previous times, 2002, 2006 and 2008
  • The Squirrels franchise won all three meetings
  • Squirrels are favored by 2 and have a 53% chance of winning

 

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