MeggaMen Get Crushed, Back Into Playoffs Anyway

This is a Zebu. Take a good look at it. The curse of the Zebus is over. The Gallic Warriors have ended their 20 year playoff drought.
Published: Dec 10, 2013

In a game the MeggaMen needed to win to take the division they got absolutely humilated by the Pretend I'm Not Here, 112-30.  The Pretend scored 59 on Monday night, including 39 out of Josh McCown of all people.  It is only the third loss by the MeggaMen to the Pretend in the last ten years (14 meetings) and continues the MeggaMen's second half collapse.  After starting 7-1, they finished 1-5.  The Sacks also beat the Woodland Rangers, 36-9, to force a three way tie for the division title.

 

The three teams all split with each other, so the head-to-head record was also tied at 2-2.  The division record also tied at 4-2 all around.  Leading to strength of victory.  All of the other four games came into play.  The only scenario that the MeggaMen would have won is the one that happened.  They end up winning the strength of victory by half a game over the Sacks and one game over the Pretend (49-62-1 to 48-62-2 to 47-62-3).  Had the Whiskey Tango or Werewolves won, the Sacks would have won the division.  If the Norsemen had won, the Pretend would have won the division.  Had the Fighting Squirrels pulled it off the Pretend and MeggaMen would have gone to the next tie breaker (point difference in head-to-head games) that based on Monday night would have won it for the Pretend.

 

The other dramatic divison was the Gold Division.  The Crusaders won their fourth in a row beating the Whiskey Tango 36-10, to clinch their 10th division title and the #1 seed.  But the real news here is that the Gallic Warriors threw off 21 years of failure, beating the Fighting Squirrels to earn their first ever playoff berth.  The 8-5-1 record is the best record ever posted by that team.

 

In the Burgundy Division, the Mansfield Onanist beat the Werewolves, 31-4.  This sends the Werewolves to their first ever Toilet Bowl.  In the final game the Ravaging Camel Clutch beat the Norsemen 31-19.

 

After the dust settled, the Crusaders end the season as the #1 seed.  The Norsemen pick up #2 based on their head-to-head victory over the MeggaMen, who get #3.  As the wild card the Gallic Warriors are #4.  Since the Crusaders and Gallic Warriors are in the same division the first round of the playoffs will feature the Crusaders vs the MeggaMen.  The MeggaMen lead the all-time series 12-10-2.  They have never met in the playoffs.  The Norsemen will play the Gallic Warriors, the Norsemen lead all-time 21-8.  This is the first season that none of the playoff teams made the playoffs the previous season.  It is also the first time that both of the previous season's Toilet Bowl teams made the playoffs.

 

The Toilet Bowl will feature the Woodland Rangers vs the Werewolves.  The Woodland Rangers lost the Toilet Bowl in 2011, as the Type Os, 19-0.  The Werewolves have never been to the Toilet Bowl.

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